Praising God First in the Midst of a Tragic Situation- Losing a Baby

  Yesterday morning while hanging my laundry I saw my neighbor, Adlene, sitting in her chair.  Adlene has been pregnant for 5 months however the pregnancy has

A couple weeks ago Adlene and I
made some cakes  for a friend. 

made her quite ill. (They call it "Tensyon" in Creole.  Many young Haitian women die from "Tensyon".  In fact, my neighbor's niece passed away this past Monday from what I suspect was this. The 7 month old baby in her womb also passed.)  After hanging my laundry I went to Adlene's house to check in on her. She was in a lot of pain and did not look good. "I haven't felt the baby in 3 days", she says. "I am in a lot of pain. My stomach hurts."  Adlene went on to tell me that the doctor said if her blood pressure doesn't come down they will have to take the baby.  (Adlene was already taking a high blood pressure pill every morning and evening.) I told her if she needed anything to call for me.  Yesterday afternoon, returning from my run, Renauld, Adlene's husband,  stopped me as I was heading home. He asked if I could take them to the hospital right away. I took a shower and we headed out. Adlene was clearly in labor. While driving her to the hospital she told me she had to go to the bathroom. I pulled over…she didn't have to go to the bathroom. The baby was coming. Before we arrived at the hospital Adlene had delivered the baby in our car. It had yet to detach from her womb though. From then on without pain medicine the doctor helped Adlene's body become free from the infection that was inside her.
 
  As we arrived home from the hospital our neighbors were waiting for Adlene. From this moment on I learned a significant lesson, one I never thought I would learn from them. As we entered Adlene's house the neighbors came in too.  Sitting in quiet, Adlene's soft cries were heard.  One man loving put his arm around her and said, "Adlene, it is time to thank God.  This is a terrible time but you still need to thank God.  For the good and difficult. Am I right? We need to thank God."  Soft whispers came from that room. "Thank-you God." I couldn't believe my ears. I didn't think I would hear those words at that time! I must have had the look of  shock because my friend Rose said, "Joy, you look like you are in shock".  Little did she know their desire to praise God first, in this tragic situation, humbled me to my core. In life's most tragic moments we are to praise God first.  So easy to say yet difficult to do.  What a lesson learned last night.

  It was interesting for me to watch how Adlene responded to this situation. I wondered,  how do Haitian men and women mourn for the little ones they never get to meet?  Do they mourn? I found out they mourn---just like us. In the hospital Renauld said little but when he spoke tears welled up in his eyes. Soft cries expressed from Adlene and soft deep moans from her soul helped me see we are more the same than I knew. She is just like me. She cries for the baby she will never be able to hold and the death she must grieve. But, unlike me, she praised God first. What an example for me to see.
 

Adlene teaching me how
to cook a couple Haitian
dishes.

  This afternoon I went to check on Adlene to see how she was doing. She had a headache yet was feeling pretty good. I told her I told my friends on the computer of her loss. And that a lot of people are praying for her. I was able to tell her that I believe that God loves her very much and that he understands. This was such a sweet time with my dear friend Adlene. Such a sweet time. I pray this will open the door to more conversations about our heavenly father. I pray this tragic experience will lead her closer to our loving Father,
not further away.

  On a total separate note this situation made me think of something else. If a baby being made in a woman's womb is just some tissue building up, my dear friend Adlene and other women who lost "tissue" wouldn't be saddened and upset by their loss. They wouldn't care. They wouldn't need to grieve. There would be zero feelings of attachment to the "tissue".  Zero feelings.  And I wouldn't think about the 2 babies I lost and often wonder who they are and what they would have been like. Adlene lost her baby last night. Her baby.  God's child.

  If you think to, pray for Renauld and Adlene.

"For you formed my inward parts; you wove me in my mother's womb.  I will give thanks to you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are your works, And my soul knows it very well.  My frame was not hidden from you, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seem my unformed substance; and in Your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them."    Psalm 139:13-16